Peer Pressure?

Ay s'been a while since my last post, sorry bout that. well today's entry is about peer pressure. well i was hangin out with my friends one day cause my friend Alfred wanted to go check out cam corders. while there we ran into my friend Sean, and we spoke to him for a bit then he told us to comeover to his house which was across the street from the mall. so we finish up at the mall and head to the his house.Sean lives on his own with 2 roomates only one roomate was home besides sean when we went and it was my friend Andy. Andy, Sean, and the other roomate went to a rave a few weeks back and we were listening to a cd one of the DJ's gave him as a sample, pretty good stuff. Anyway my friends Mitcho,Alfred and Alvin went to check out the gym in the apartment complex. I decided to stay with Sean and Andy as they told me stories about the rave and how fun it was. The typical thing people do at raves is take Ecstacy and that's not really my cup o tea. I'll go, I'll mingle, i'll prolly dance, but taking drugs isn't my thing. So Andy asked me if i went to the next one would i take some, i told him i prolly wouldn't and then he asked me why. i'm not the type of person that cares about alot of stuff, i believe that if a person wants to do something and it's not bothering me or hurting anyone else they can do it, but putting a drug like ecstacy into my system is a different story. This is a world of people who you never would have thought would ever even touch drugs are hooked on them the next day and i don't feel like being one of those people. nor do i feel like being the guy that dies just because he made a stupid mistake once. They gave me reasons that sounded something like, everything looks so cool when you're on it, and there's almost no side effects except that you'll be tired the next day. My favorite reason sounded something like...After you take it you'll feel more comfortable around people and you'll be open and you'll be the person you wanna be. and with those words my resolve of not taking reached an all time high. I also believe that i don't need a drug, pill,food, or anything else to be comfortable and make me who i want to be i choose to work and be comfortable and confident on my own. I'm just glad i am the way i am otherwise...

The Realist and The Dreamer

I'm back with more thoughts on my mind,it's kinda late so forgive me if this doesn't come out the right way well here goes. In the past i considered myself a realist, not believing in luck, miracles, or anything else. Things were what they were in this cruel world nothing comes for free, just because you want something you won't get it and even if you work for it it's not 100% that you will get it, and if you can't see, touch, and hear something all at the same time then it must not be real.Up until last April i believed in all these things with all my heart. Well i met the woman that makes me feel the description of love i wrote in my last post, the only small problem is i met her online, it's small because i still met a woman that makes me feel this way and keeps my trust at the same time while not making me second guess my actions. the big problem for the realist i used to be is where she lives, she lives on the other side of the world in Malaysia. As my Feelings grew for her they gave rise to the dreamer. at the begining the dreamer and the realist fought. the dreamer only saw how things could be while the realist saw what things were. what the dreamer saw in how things could be is that there was a woman out there that he had connected with and loved with all his heart.
The realist would fight back with arguments such as how will you get there? where will you stay once you get there?
The dreamer looked at the points the realist had made and began to ponder the questions and at last he had found one. the answer was "it doesn't matter" the realist was confused by the answer and the dreamer began to explain.That even tho we were so far away we're still on the same earth only space keeps us apart they put men on the moon and now i can't travel a few thousand miles? all things worth having require work and a plan, so if i make a plan and work toward making it possible then you can do something as simple as crossing an ocean for the woman you love right? the realist had no real arguement against the dreamer. but since the dreamer saw more than what could be i guess i can't call that part the dreamer anymore, the dreamer saw what would have to be in order to make his dreams come true and with that said the realist and the dreamer settled their arguement and began to both see what would have to be done. I guess what i'm trying to say is that as my love grew i changed my way of thinking from a person that only believed that wohat i could touch and see was real into a person that believed feelings and bonds can be formed with just words and emotions alone and that's why i want to make my dream come true.

The Thing Called Love

Today my topic is love. Love...a word that has gained many meanings over time yet, many people still claim to be in the same "Love" as their partner. What is Love really? an emotion that bonds people together forever? a feeling that makes us want to be with one person for the rest of our lives? is it even something that can be described in such a simple way? well to answer the question of what "Love" is i think you just need to ask yourself what you think it is. For example you're dating someone for a few years and you get bored of the same old same old and break up, but in the course of that year you began to feel what you would call "Love" for that person. Was it actually not "Love" that you felt for the person or is "Love" a fading emotion that comes and goes like a tide on the beach. It's up to you to decide. Anyways moving on to "Love" as it applys itself in the modern day.
In the US, in 2005 there were 7.5 new marriages per 1,000 people, and 3.6 divorces per 1,000, a ratio which has existed for many individual years since the 1960s.[1] As many statisticians have pointed out, it is very hard to count the divorce rate, since it is hard to determine if a couple who divorce and get back together in that same year should be considered a divorce, so there is in fact no predictive relationship between the two annual totals. Nonetheless, the claim that "half of all marriages end in divorce" became widely accepted in the US in the 1970s, on the basis of this statistic, and has remained conventional wisdom. Pollster Lewis Harris in his 1987 book "Inside America" wrote that "the idea that half of American marriages are doomed is one of the most specious pieces of statistical nonsense ever perpetuated in modern times."

As it says above nearly half of the marriages out of 1000 people ended in divorce. Is it a sign that "Love" is getting harder and harder for people to find, i kinda think so. I'm at home alot so I watch alot of T.V in the mornings i'm sure you people at home in the day time have flipped through and seen a talk show where men/women who claim to "Love" the person they were with must confess that they have infact cheated/have been cheating alot, and i ask myself... if you truly loved a person as much as you claim to then why would you go with another person knowing full well that it could put the relationship in danger. Which brings me to where i started off at, "Love" doesn't have just one meaning but what it means to me is a feeling that will never fade with time as long as your with the person you claim to love, it means that you won't do anything that you wouldn't want your partner to do in your situation, it means taking responsibility where you have done wrong and learning to correct yourself and grow for the person you love, it means giving forgiveness to the one you love that has done wrong in certain situations(I can forgive something the first time but after the second time I expect that the person knew what they were doing) in short I believe that "Love" should be the strongest emotion you have for a person and you are made better because you love someone. But i feel that seince people are socializing more these days and entering more relationships they often confuse what they feel for a person as "Love" thus they repeat the cycle of:"Single>friends>like>date>"Love">get bored>break up>Single" after a series of trips in cycle i believe one begins to get the sense that there is no one out there for them and that "Love" doesn't exist. When i compare myself to those people i see that i never was in that cycle and i never want to be because when you enter that cycle i think you begin to take people and relationships for granted in a way. Well iono just my opinion thanx for reading.

(No Subject)

Some people call me Rock, some people call me Jaquan, most people call me Greg tho. nice ta meetcha readers and now on to what you been wantin ta read. As most of you know I'm an african american, I was born in New York City and now i live in Texas. I don't really fit in with other people of my race very well, not at all actually, but i don't mind because you should hang out with people you get along with not just because they look a certain way. It's a messed up thing to feel rejected by "your own people" because of the way you act and talk and then be rejected by others because the way you look. Even with the people i know now i have to put up with comments such as "but your black man it's in your blood to..." and that's what my "friends" say. One day i was walking down the hall and this girl was talking to her friend and goes"that's why you hang out with that white boy over there" and she points to me. i kept walking tho, i'm not the type to start anything over something so trivial. Being a "Racial Reject" like me i guess has it's good things as well, i figure that if people could stop worrying about what a person looks like and give them a chance because they are a person, not because they are white, black, red, or yellow. I do what i do because it's what i like to do, not because I'm black, or to prove something to someone, or to gain false respect from my peers. I am what i am, not because of what i look like but because it is who i choose to be. thanx for reading hope ta see ya back soon, peace.